I'm So Fancy. You Already Know.

11:24am -- I’m a 90% yes for tonight but can’t stay out long because I have to get up early for work

3:45pm -- Ugh, yeah. It’ll be really nice to see everybody, I’m just bummed that I can’t go hard because I have to work tomorrow. I literally cannot function without sleep these days, you know

7:03pm -- I’m going out tonight for the first time since I think February… yeah, it’s my classmate’s birthday... I have to be up for work by 6… luckily it’s a Cash Only bar, so I can’t get crazy...I have two alarms set and I’ll tell everyone when I get there that I can’t stay long. I need to be home by 1

7:17pm -- Wanna grab a drink before, somewhere that isn’t cash only?

8:30ish -- Well, I mean… one more won’t kill me right?

9ish -- Hmm, I wonder if it’s going to be a bad idea to drink beer, then red wine, then tequila… Oh well!

An indeterminate amount of time later -- Yes, kind sir, I would like to sing Fancy on your karaoke machine. But the Iggy one, don’t pull that Reba shit on me.

??? -- Excuse me, can you help me work this ATM?

10:33pm -- [Outgoing call, 54 minutes] Mumble mumble marble mouth, slur stumble, murmur.

6am -- [Alarm goes off] No, no, no, no, no, no, no.

Which is how I found myself eating a $4 breakfast burrito at 7:30am, praying the Holy Trinity of eggs, breakfast sausage, and tater tots would forgive me my trespasses, even as I forgive those who trespass against me. I can say with great certainty this is exactly how I did not want to feel during my last tutoring shift of the semester. You know what’s worse than a whole room full of stressed out, sleep-deprived, undernourished college students? Doing grammar edits for a whole room full of stressed out, sleep-deprived, undernourished college students.

But! We did it, people. Next Tuesday our class will turn in their final research paper. Thursday, after we eat snacks, listen to music, and celebrate the end of the semester, we’ll turn our sweet baby angels loose for an entire summer.

For those of you who don’t know what my real life looks like, here’s the 411. This spring I was hired into a local community college’s Instructional Apprentice program. Apprentices are embedded in a classroom and paired with a mentor prof. We get to help develop lesson plans, learn how to grade things, lead class discussions, and generally learn the ropes of #thatteacherlife with a safety net. On top of our hours in the classroom, we work shifts in the English Center, tutoring for every level of English and ESOL (English for Speakers of Other Languages). Let me tell you, some intense mind acrobatics go down when you’re helping one student practice verb tenses and providing another with organizational notes on a 5-7 page research paper.

Now that the fog has cleared and I have a two hour nap under my belt, I’m cozied up in bed with a mug of peppermint tea feeling reflective and also a little nauseous still, but that’s neither here nor there. Working at the English Center I met some incredible people, students and coworkers alike. Working with ESOL students, I got to see my language in a whole new light, through the lens of various cultures. I heard stories about arranged marriages, family members kidnapped by militias. It’s wild to read a paragraph about woman’s brother being captured during the Korean War. To tell her she needs to pay closer attention to her verb tenses.

When I applied to grad school, I wrote that I believe everybody has a story to tell and I want to be instrumental in helping them discover it. This semester I finally got to see what that looks like on a practical level and it’s just as good as I hoped it would be.

So. Since I didn’t say it before as I was stumbling out the door, I’ll say it now: thank you Universe for giving me so many opportunities this year. Thank you English Center for the experience and knowledge. Thank you community college food court, for putting tater tots in literally everything you sell. And thank you especially to my precious little band of tutees for sharing your stories, laughter, and delicious homemade snacks with me.

All my love,

b